Thursday, April 26, 2007

Randomesticity: TV Edition

I've been trying to keep myself relaxed by keeping the TV on, but so far it's not working. Here are a few reasons why...

- That damn Carnival Cruises ad. Yeah, that towel-puppy was super cute, but, dagnabbit, who on earth is that person they've hired to sing the jingle in the background? Every time I hear "In the morning, in the evening, ain't we've got fun" I get horrible flashbacks from the audition shows from American Idol. Is this supposed to be an improvement from Kathie Lee's pitchy singing?

- Dear Announcer Guy#1: The correct pronunciation for the word O`ahu is Oh-AHH-hoo. Please take note of this, because every time you tell me to go down to my "WAH-hoo" Ford dealer I am tempted to call up my Ford dealer and ask them why they're stealing car-dealership ads from Nebraska.

-Dear Announcer Guy #2: You know the place where they're going to show The Lion King here in Honolulu? It's the BlaisDELL Arena, not the BlaisDALE Arena. Geez, have a little respect, why don't you?

-I think I stay up late enough to let you all know that our late night infomercials are really, really lame. Seriously, every time I hear something about some late night scam or computer virus stopper, it makes me almost nostalgic for the Showtime Oven or the Magic Bullet. Or - heck, I'll say it - one of those infomercials where hot women tell the male viewers in the audience that their device can help them enlarge "a certain body part." Fantastic.

-... On the plus side, I have finally made peace with KGMB-9 News, or at least the 10 o'clock newscast. Not just for the sweet note that Cedric left for me a few months ago, or the fact that I saw Kim Gennaula right in front of me at Williams Sonoma (yep, she is just as perky IRL, but much more pleasant) and remembered a few nice things that she has done for some friends of mine. It's also because of the little, simpler things... like Keahi's blink-and-you'll-miss-it snark (seriously, guys, you have to watch the news live to catch it here and there... just tonight he was able to zing Dubya and Guy Hagi, which made me giggle insanely), or the sports profiles that don't focus on UH sports (kudos to Liz and Steve). Well played, news team.

Saturday, April 21, 2007

Give My Regards To...

Dear Duncan Sheik:

I'll admit it, I've always listened to your music back in college, and I would still not kick you out of bed for eating crackers. But THIS...

...Dude, I'm happy that you've been able to get your show on Broadway and all that, but you owe me (or at least somebody in my immediate social circle) front-row tickets to Spring Awakening just for getting this damn song stuck in my head. (And it doesn't help that it got earwormed thoroughly after that Letterman rerun last week.) Until that happens, I am going to use all of my powers to flush this earworm out of my brain.

Off to request "Barely Breathing" at the karaoke bar,


EDITED 4/25/2007: Now I know why "Bitch of Living" is driving me bananas - the song has almost the exact same chords as "On a High," which I just heard at the supermarket the other day. GAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!

Sunday, April 15, 2007

A Sad Day in Hawaii

It doesn't matter where you were on the debate of the commodification of Hawaii or the cheesiness of "tourist" culture: Don Ho was The Man. Rest in peace, Don.

Monday, April 09, 2007

An Open Letter

To: Unilever USA and the powers-that-be behind Sunsilk in the United States
From: Me
Re: your new commercials

Sirs, I am a believer in your product, and I honestly think that you have a good enough brand worth trying by all women. So why are you all trying to muck it all up with all these super-annoying ads on my television?

First it's the catty voice-overs from the obviously gay "experts," and now it's the catty blondes making sarcastic remarks about how their hair makes them so much better than everyone else. (Yes, I'm aware that there's a brunette version, but c'mon - who are you fooling?) It's beginning to make me wonder if anyone in your company really, really cares about your target audience.

I just can't believe that you, of all people, would allow these ads to continue, especially since Sunsilk does share the same parent company as Dove - and y'all know how much we enjoy the Dove ads, even if we don't necessarily have to believe in the Dove product itself. Yeah, I know, the whole "Campaign for Real Beauty" can be a little too kum-ba-yah for most peoples' tastes, but that doesn't make the cattiness of the Sunsilk campaign any less annoying... or distastefully fake, for that matter.

Come to think of it, all those Sunsilk ads that I've been seeing on TV lately are beginning to make me wonder if you've hired the same ad agency who's handling the Burger King account right now.

Please make it stop - or I will have to ask my parents to start sending me Sunsilk from the Philippines so I won't have to spend American money on your product any more. At least the ad campaigns from our neck of the woods doesn't make me retch with all the forced snark.