What's Your Fantasy: Accent Coaching Edition

Maybe it's my inner theater geek talking here, but lately I've noticed that I have a real thing for guys who speak with accents. And not just any accent, come to think of it, but accents spoken by native English speakers from actual English-speaking countries.

Consider the following:

1) Colin Firth (but of course!) as a stuttering royal in The King's Speech, with the added bonus of Helena Bonham Carter as the Queen Mum (complete with gentrified Scottish accent) and Geoffrey Rush as a London-based Aussie.



2) Gerard Butler (again: but of course!) delivering the weather forecast for GMTV, which goes without saying.



3) Garrett Hedlund, born and raised in Northern Minnesota - but trained to bend inflections according to each role.



4) Curtis Stone, proving that a natural Australian accent doesn't always have to scrape the eardrums when done right.



5) Bono, introducing "the song Charles Manson stole from The Beatles" in that unmistakable brogue.



6) ...And then there's this clip, which is one of two great examples of how an untempered Canadian accent could get me in trouble if I'm not careful enough. (The other great example, in case you were wondering, can be found here.)



And since I can't just put all of this up without giving some love to the homegrown talent, here's my favorite commercial for Greenwich Pizza, starring the walking cuteness that is John Lloyd Cruz - and one heck of a catchphrase, at around the 0:42 mark.

What's Your Fantasy: Sexiest Blog Entry Alive

Here's the thing: There is no way for me- and I mean NO WAY - to let this weekend pass without saying anything about Ryan Reynolds being named the Sexiest Man Alive by People magazine.

Screencap: People.com

On the one hand: I still need to sit down and watch an entire Ryan Reynolds movie from beginning to end. (Trailers don't count, and neither do reruns of Two Guys, A Girl, and a Pizza Place.) Part of me doesn't want to know what on earth is up with his marriage to Scarlett Johansson. Also, most of the photos I've seen on the People site makes him look like a cornered deer, and that trailer for Green Lantern is... kind of underwhelming.

On the other hand:

1. Hot.
2. Canadian.
3. To paraphrase my cousin: It's been 11 years since Two Guys, A Girl, and a Pizza Place, and his hair is still the same. Which, to me, is pretty endearing. 
4. Watching the Green Lantern trailer made me realize that - finally - I have found a leading man who is capable and very much qualified to unleash all sorts of whup-ass on Peter Sarsgaard, even if it is a bald-headed Sarsgaard covered in several layers of makeup and CGI. (Pete, seriously - love you, still find you hot, but Tom Cruise doesn't count as a worthy adversary.)
5. Let's face it: I think it's about time People chose somebody in my age bracket for their Sexiest Man Alive. The best way to explain why this factoid is nice for me to know has a lot to do with the fact that Ryan comes across as a guy who doesn't let his goofiness get the better of him. Which leads us to the next point...
6. I also have it on good authority (okay, LaineyGossip, but still) that he really is funny, charming, articulate, and an upstanding citizen overall in real life. This analysis, in particular, is quite revealing. 
7. He told People that he makes "a mean omelette." He already had me at the word "omelette" anyway. 
8. Did I already mention that he's hot?
9. And Canadian?
10. Which means that I now feel a lot less guilty about drooling over a really hot Canadian guy with a sense of humor and the capability to recreate a savory egg-based dish using a frying pan. (Wink wink, nudge nudge! Say no more! Say no more!) 

When Meimei Disappears

You might be worried about the title up here, after all the disturbing blog entries that I've been putting up lately. And no, I'm not talking about running off to Canada, even if it means better Food Network programming and even better potato chip flavors.

(Also because the alleged future father of my supposedly ramen-haired children has now moved to Los Angeles, which I am trying my best not to take as a sign. Or something.)

ANYWAY-

Two things: First, I have become invested in the World Series of Baseball lately. As much as I like the Rangers for their pwnage of the Yankees (who I still hate, in spite of the pretty that is Derek Jeter), I'm totally rooting for the Giants because 1) I have a lot of friends in San Francisco right now who want to end the torture, and 2) George W. Bush, which goes without saying.

And besides, the Giants has my part-Pinoy homeboy Tim Lincecum, even though he really needs to cut his hair if he wants to be taken seriously. (Seriously, Tim: You sort of have the Joseph Gordon-Levitt thing going on. Win Game 5 already so you can finally visit a barber in the off-season!)

And second:

It's my first time doing NaNoWriMo, and already it has taken over my soul. Never mind that I'm a sworn writing geek when it comes to these things, and never mind that I have lost enough of my mind to describe one of my characters as an angry blogger and another as this guy playing the part of this guy and this guy, but more Irish.

(Horrors! Meimei has based a character on ANTHONY FRIGGING BOURDAIN! Run for the hills!)

(...No, I definitely was kidding. Please don't sue me, Tony. But do send me the home addresses for the other two, if you have them lying around and/or your lawyers don't mind.)

The whole novel's been mapped out already, though, and I'm thinking about getting 20% done before work starts and I lose more of my mind. Assuming, of course, that the World Series doesn't go into Game 7.

Okay, that's enough writing for now. I'm going downstairs to check on the game. And by "game" I really do mean Game 5.

EDITED @7:03 PM to say GIANTS WIN! GIANTS WIN! GIANTS WIN! And also that I'm using this guy instead as the physical prototype for my lead male character. I love you, Gerard, but I figured that Jeremy would make a more convincing pancake-flipper.

Domesticity Halloween Spectacular 2010

A note from Meimei: 
Now, here's a Halloween entry for you, chock full of shocking revelations and terrifying twists. Unfortunately, I had to put this entry under a break due to the sensitive nature of its contents - especially when you consider  that the bulk of this entry contains memos and documents retrieved from the offices of TLC Southeast Asia (and/or possibly hallucinated by yours truly during a Dairy Milk binge) which may prove to be extremely scandalous. If you have a low tolerance for scandal (and/or satire), proceed at your own risk...

Fun With Screengrabs

Dear Lush:

From this year's collection of Lush Christmas products. Drool. 

If I buy this lip balm, does that mean Bob Blumer will show up at my house and make out with me?

(Or at least tell me that he has created his own version of Razon's Halo-Halo using bananas poached in maple syrup. That would be awesome. And hot.)

And speaking of Lush:

This ad actually showed up on my blog a few days ago (thanks, Nuffnang) and immediately I thought, "Dang, they finally made a drugstore version of Coalface?" Mind, I've never washed my face with any kind of black carbon technology whatnots, but I did learn from reading Lush Times that the black stuff is often recommended for folks with oily skin. That's enough for me to buy the "cleansing impurities" angle, since I've seen a lot of girls out here with all sorts of acne problems regardless of skin color.

Now if only we could get the marketing monkeys to admit that they're only using the "whitening" angle to sell product that actually does nothing for pigmentation...

Randomesticity: Random Acts of Hotness

 A picture of me with my new haircut, plus neutral makeup and pearls. Career girl, much?

Today, on this special edition of Randomesticity: beauty and pop culture news!

BEAUTY




- Above: Chanel Rouge Coco. 'Nuff said.

- Okay, MAC, you got me again - Too Fabulous is exactly that, and more. Those of you who missed the blushes from the Colour Forecast collections would find the Mineralize Blush Duos to be of interest.

- Cover Girl is promising that they can match shades from any department store brand using their online matching system. Whether or not they can deliver on their promises, however, depends on how you feel about CG's formulations. (My opinion only: Not a fan of their lip gloss, but I really like their eyeshadows and mascaras just fine, and I'm trying to get my hands on their lipstain as we speak.)

- Speaking of eyeshadows: Maybelline's EyeStudio shadows have been available in Asia for quite some time, but I prefer the shade selection from the American version of the quads.

- Beauty vlogger alert! If you haven't tuned in to sisters Elle and Blair - aka AllThatGlitters21 and Juicystar07, respectively - you owe it to yourselves to check 'em out. I'm predicting Lauren Luke-like success for these young ladies, so it would behoove the makers of their favorite brands (lookin' atcha, NYX and Lush) to snap them up as collaborators soon.

POP CULTURE HOTNESS

- And now it has come to this: A cute photo of Apolo Anton Ohno with Charles Hamelin. Or, as I like to call it, Two Dudes Who Could Really Use a Spa Day. (I kid, I kid.)

- Speaking of hot dudes on ice: I demand to know who on earth had the brilliant idea of casting Evan Lysacek on this season of Dancing With The Stars, because that boy is the very definition of HOT DAMN! (Unfortunately, the cable channels in my neck of the woods don't carry DWTS, so said embodiment of HOT DAMN! won't be showing up on my TV until I can get BitTorrent to work.)

Also: According to Google Search, Canada does not exactly have their own home-grown edition of DWTS. Well, there goes my dream of watching a Hamelin brother perform the paso doble in a sparkly costume...

- In the mood for some hot Filipino dishiness? Well, guess what I just read in the paper this morning...

DEREK RAMSAY IS SINGLE! DEREK RAMSAY IS SINGLE!* 

(*pending actual confirmation of actual split with his girlfriend from all parties involved, which means I'm taking this news with an entire box of Kosher Salt)

OTHER  RANDOMNESS

-  So I did get the Ford Focus hatchback that I wrote about earlier, and now I can drive it around - short distances mostly, though I am [theoretically] capable of driving this baby on a highway. What I still don't have in the car, however, is an iPod adapter - but the good news is that it does have a CD player, so I'm looking forward to loading it up with some cool sounds. Some of the CDs I'd like to get for the car: Alicia Keys' The Element of Freedom (am I the only person on earth who can't wait to see the video for "Put It in a Love Song" - and not in an ironic, "let's see how Beyonce and Alicia could out-crazy each other" kind of way?); Sade's Soldier of Love; and Vampire Weekend's Contra. And the new Michael Buble album, which I'm borrowing from my Dad.

- On top of the career craziness that's been happening these last two months (board exams! new jobs!) I'm also trying to carve out time to write more fiction. In fact, I've started taking on the mother of all fiction projects by writing... gaaaak... a screenplay.  I can't promise this will end well, but I will try my best.

Credits: Yours truly (yours truly) and PinoyCelebrities.net (Derek Ramsay). No samples were provided by the manufacturers of all beauty products mentioned in this story. 


EDITED (03/05/2010) to add that the same paper that reported Derek Ramsay's availability now says that he did get back together with the girlfriend. Awwwwww. Which means I can return to my ongoing plans for world domination. 

The Hair. THE HAIR.

You may have probably noticed that some of the male "hotties" that I often mention on this blog share a vaguely similar trait: wavy, messy, slightly grungy hair. Peter Sarsgaard, in Shattered Glass? Guilty. Simon Baker, in The Mentalist? Doubly guilty. Rafe Spall, in the entirety of that placeholder post from last summer? Definitely guilty on all counts, and should be sentenced to several weeks' worth of deep-conditioning treatments if he didn't know what was best for him.

[/still bitter because I've watched Hot Fuzz a billion times on TV, and yet nobody has taken my idea of casting Andy Cartwright as Patrick Jane's brother in The Mentalist - okay, not really, but still]

Let us not even forget the glory that used to be Gerard Butler's hair in the otherwise craptastic Dracula 2000...



...to say the least of my long-standing, old-guy crush on Jeff Bridges and his glorious head of hair, which not even the all-over grunginess of Crazy Heart could obscure. (Yes, it broke my heart when he had to go bald for Iron Man.)

(And, at this time, we should point out that Jeremy Renner has responded by thanking Colin Firth, Jason Statham, and Gilles Marini for reintroducing him to the concept of soap and water. Heh.) 

I mention this because I have been following the men's speed-skating events in the Winter Olympics, which means that I have been regularly exposed to THIS: 

 
Ladies and gentlemen, Canadian short-track speed-skater Charles Hamelin: frequent record holder, and one of the few folks outside of Team USA or the South Korean team worth betting on during the heats.

Here, the hair looks pretty good... but on the ice, when it's barely concealed by that speed-skating helmet? Good grief. Frizz everywhere, with the woolly beard hair sticking out like overgrown moss from under the chin strap and over the collar. Every single time that my Dad and I watch speed-skating, I always point to him and say, "Hey, it's the Canadian guy with Jesus hair." (No offense to my own Lord and Savior, but... really.)

The crazy part of it all is that the combination of all that grungy hair with the helmet, rainbow-tint Oakleys, and full-body spandex uniform takes so much of the pretty away from poor Charles. In fact, as I was sizing up the competitors for speed skating based on how they looked on the track alone, I actually thought that Francois Hamelin looked much, much better than his brother. (Never mind that, outside of the uniform, Francois is basically the French Canadian version of B.J. Novak.)

Eye candy factor aside, I like watching short-track speed skating because it's not that hard to watch: everyone skates fast, and whoever gets to the finish line without tripping over the other person or falling on one's rear end wins. And while I have a lot of respect for les freres Hamelin and the South Korean skating team, I also have to give a shoutout to Team USA - not just for my mestizo homeboy J.R. Celski, but also for Apolo Anton Ohno... who will always have my undying love and respect, just for THIS:



Credits: anthonygeorge.wordpress.com via Google Images (Jeff Bridges); Le Blogue de Le Point via Google Images (Charles Hamelin) 

EDITED @ 2/27/2010 to differentiate between speed skating and short-track speed skating. BIG distinction. Also to fix some major punctuation issues. 

Trendwatch 2010: OMG Chef Iz Daddeh!

And now... a return from a much-needed Lenten mini-break. 

Fact: Having kids changes everything. I'm a childless singleton myself, but I've seen it so many times with my friends who've just had kids (including Scribey) that it's definitely undeniable.

Fact: Having kids changes everything, especially when you're a dude. This I don't have to explain, since I live with my parents and I'm still trying to wrap my brain around the things my dear PapaMei did before fatherhood changed his life.

Fact: If you are a male chef - and especially if you are a male celebrity chef of certain prominence and/ or notoriety - having kids will change everything in ways that you would never expect.

Okay, so "celebrity chefs as dads" is not a new trend. Gordon Ramsay and Tom Colicchio have kids; so do Mario Batali, Emeril Lagasse, and Tyler Florence. Heck, even Christopher Kimball has kids. (Not that I'd doubt Mr. Bowtie's ability to reproduce; I just don't want to know how, is what I'm saying.)  Some of the chef-hosts I've seen from the Food Network Canada reruns shown here, like Michael Smith and Roger Mooking, have talked about how Becoming A Dad has changed their culinary approaches.

What does stand out as trend-worthy, however, is the concept of fatherhood as a signifier of major change in a chef's public image.

Witness, for example, Jamie Oliver's speech at the TED 2010 conference:




And then, there's our favorite potty-mouthed culinary bad boy (and known embodiment of the chef-as-debauched rock star archetype) Anthony Bourdain, turning up as a guest star in - of all places - Yo Gabba Gabba! 



In fact, now that I've mentioned this, I'd like to go ahead and nominate a few more food-show hosts for the inevitable on-screen "OMG I IZ DADDEH!" epiphany:

• David Rocco (Food Network Canada): I want to hate him based on his show alone; he has the face and body of a GQ model, lives in Italy with his gorgeous wife, and gets to cook - and eat - all sorts of fresh and delicious Italian food while exploring a life that I can only dream of... in other words, the male version of Giada de Laurentiis. His Wikipedia entry, however, mentions that he and his aforementioned wifey just had equally beautiful twin daughters, so I'm totally looking forward to the episodes where he cooks for the girls.
  
• Adam Richman (Travel Channel, USA): Now here's a thought for you - the guy from Man Vs. Food, taking time out of his busy schedule of chowing down and pigging out to reproduce. Regardless of how that thought is coming into your mind right now, you gotta admit that it's more palatable (pun intended) than seeing Andrew Zimmern on Sesame Street.
  
• Bob Blumer (Food Network Canada): Not that I would know if he's available - let alone willing, for that matter - but I've already stated in this very blog that I am willing to volunteer myself for the cause, so that's that...
  
• Curtis Stone (late of TLC, though I still prefer him on Surfing the Menu): ...Annnnnd, in the off-chance that Bob Blumer really isn't up to the task, I'm going to join that very long line of female shoppers at Whole Foods who have been waiting for him to, um, be taken home for the purpose of spawning his messy-haired babies. Heh.
  
• Guy Fieri (Food Network USA). On second thought... um, no.

What's Your Fantasy: Feast for Life Edition

Dear Discovery Travel & Living Southeast Asia:

- Please tell Janet Hsieh to stop screaming, or at least tell her people to stop sending those clips of her screaming. I've already met my WOOO! Girl quota with reruns of How I Met Your Mother, thanks.

- Please continue to air reruns of No Reservations, and in particular the one where Anthony Bourdain visits the Philippines. You know how we feel about our country, so it's nice to be reminded, time and again, that Tony believes we have the BEST. PIG. EVER.

- Also, I need more Chef Abroad, too. Too bad that I am never home whenever that show comes on... unless you count that one show where I thought I saw Michael Smith in the kitchen with Marco Pierre White, and even then I can't be sure that it was him.

- You know which show also needs more reruns? Jamie at Home. As much as I love the documentaries about Jamie Oliver's wacky experiments with school lunches and fighting British obesity (and how delicious is it that Timothy Spall gets to do the narration for the Ministry of Food documentary?), I would rather watch him skinning pheasants and harvesting rutabagas. I swear, watching him in the garden relaxes me.

- And speaking of hosts who happen to be cute, it would be nice if you could deliver any of the following to my doorstep, preferably on the days when my parents are away from the Hacienda:

Andrew Anthony, from Life's a Trip (yep, it was the haka episode that lured me in)


Bob Blumer, from Glutton for Punishment (because one second of him sticking his tongue out unconsciously is way hotter - to me, at least - than 30 minutes of Gilles Marini taking his clothes off... and that's saying A LOT)



And because I have this alphabetical-order Canadian-host theme going on right now, I'll throw in Corbin Tomaszeski (even though his humor on that kitchen show reminds me a bit of that annoying handyman from the last few seasons of Clean House)


Also, because I'm not that blind, I'm also going to ask for Bobby Chinn and Curtis Stone as well... as long as they shut up and keep cooking, heh.




Other than that, thank you so much for continuing to be part of our cable package, and for keeping me sane during these last few months. Y'all rock.

Mahalo, Meimei