Trendwatch 2009: Is This Supposed to Keep Me Warm?

First of all, I know that Oahu has been cold and windy these last two weeks, so I understand the need to keep warm. Heck, I'm the one who bought a sweater coat at Sears this morning because I got tired of freezing myself off while my other jackets are in the wash. But:




No. Just... no. I don't care if you call this a Snuggie or a Slanket, or if you were one of the few people on this island who purchased the printed rip-offs that I saw this morning: something about it is just not right, yo.

Speaking of things that are supposed to keep you warm: Will somebody please explain these hats to me?

I've been seeing this all over the place, and now with all these girls posing with these fetching little hats on this season of American Idol I'm afraid this is going to be the Mainland equivalent of the Jasmine Trias flower-behind-the-ear. Even the Fug Girls reported no less than Rachel Zoe running around with a similar knit hat perched just so behind her head.

Which begs the question: What's the point?

It's supposed to be a "beret," but I've always thought berets were meant to be worn above and across the crown (as in here and here), not behind the cranium. It looks like a rasta hat (and I should know, because I had one in 8th grade), but these ones are brimless and most of the girls I've seen are rocking the hat with flat-ironed bangs... regardless of whether or not they tuck the rest of the hair into the hat.

You know what it looks like to me? An oversize snood. Yep, you heard me: the kind of hair accessory that toes the line between Ren-Faire and Cafeteria Lady. THERE, I'VE SAID IT.

Don't even get me started on the wide gauge on some of these hats, which would probably keep the heat in if they were used to contain an appropriately generous - and appropriately textured - head of hair. (This, coming from the person who still hasn't given up on the watch cap since 1995 because it was the only hat that kept her head warm despite her baby-fine hair. Hah.)

So: slouchy knit hats in general - cute, overrated, or the hat equivalent of "Dreadlock Holiday"?