Friday, January 21, 2011

A Pump and Lift Special: Check Yourself Out

This is how you know you've finally gotten over the issues that you have with your body.

You only worry about two things whenever you go swimming: sunburns, and drowning.

You have the power to say no to just about anything and anyone - the extra serving, the dress that won't fit you, even the skeevy guy who just won't take no for an answer.

When you do lose your willpower at the dinner table, you know that it's not the end of the world. Just drink more water and try again tomorrow; you'll be fine.

You don't lose sleep over the fact that fashion magazines - and the models who pose for them - have nothing to do with your real life as it is, and neither do they relate to your own personal aspirations. If you do lose sleep over it, and they do affect your real life as it is, that's because you already work in a field related to the fashion industry.

When you go to the gym, and you look at the hot person running on the treadmill next to you, you think, "Hey, new workout buddy! Wanna race?"

When random guys tell you that you're looking good, you know that they're not saying that because they want to hit on you. Especially if they happen to be members of the clergy.

When you say, "I can't see myself wearing that," you're saying it because the outfit already looks terrible and out of place on whoever happens to be wearing it at that time. Seriously, if you've been reading Go Fug Yourself, you'd know that even the hot and sexy people of the world - especially the ones with amazing bodies - end up wearing crappy clothes in public once in a while.

When random strangers tell you that you're looking good, you smile and say, without any doubt, the best answer you could give in this situation: "Why, thank you!" 

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