Dear Discovery Travel & Living Southeast Asia:
- Please tell Janet Hsieh to stop screaming, or at least tell her people to stop sending those clips of her screaming. I've already met my WOOO! Girl quota with reruns of How I Met Your Mother, thanks.
- Please continue to air reruns of No Reservations, and in particular the one where Anthony Bourdain visits the Philippines. You know how we feel about our country, so it's nice to be reminded, time and again, that Tony believes we have the BEST. PIG. EVER.
- Also, I need more Chef Abroad, too. Too bad that I am never home whenever that show comes on... unless you count that one show where I thought I saw Michael Smith in the kitchen with Marco Pierre White, and even then I can't be sure that it was him.
- You know which show also needs more reruns? Jamie at Home. As much as I love the documentaries about Jamie Oliver's wacky experiments with school lunches and fighting British obesity (and how delicious is it that Timothy Spall gets to do the narration for the Ministry of Food documentary?), I would rather watch him skinning pheasants and harvesting rutabagas. I swear, watching him in the garden relaxes me.
- And speaking of hosts who happen to be cute, it would be nice if you could deliver any of the following to my doorstep, preferably on the days when my parents are away from the Hacienda:
Andrew Anthony, from Life's a Trip (yep, it was the haka episode that lured me in)
Bob Blumer, from Glutton for Punishment (because one second of him sticking his tongue out unconsciously is way hotter - to me, at least - than 30 minutes of Gilles Marini taking his clothes off... and that's saying A LOT)
And because I have this alphabetical-order Canadian-host theme going on right now, I'll throw in Corbin Tomaszeski (even though his humor on that kitchen show reminds me a bit of that annoying handyman from the last few seasons of Clean House)
Also, because I'm not that blind, I'm also going to ask for Bobby Chinn and Curtis Stone as well... as long as they shut up and keep cooking, heh.
Other than that, thank you so much for continuing to be part of our cable package, and for keeping me sane during these last few months. Y'all rock.