Friday, February 11, 2011

This Year's Semi-Obligatory V-Day Entry

So: Valentine's Day.

Five years ago, I wrote this entry to my Unnamed Prospective Valentine - which did not get anyone's attention, and perhaps for good reason. (Bear in mind that this happened in the early days of Teh Internets, when Facebook was just a "killer app" and beauty bloggers were not always obligated to post pictures of themselves.) A few great romantic moments have come and gone since then, but this sentiment remains:
I guess you might have gotten the memo by now that I've stopped waiting for you to come around, have you? It's not that I don't believe that you exist - come on, you're talking to a girl that still believes in Santa Claus[...] it's just that - well, let's face it, neither one of us is getting any younger, and a single girl's gotta start managing her expectations. 
Granted, that hasn't stopped me from doing a lot of stupid things in the name of love (and/or lust), and neither has it stopped me from wondering if I'm doomed to be judged as a neurotic old maid for the rest of my life. Still, the sentiment still stands, and - despite all my doubts, as much as it hurts - I must soldier on.

Which brings me back to the concept of Big, Scary Things.

Inspired by this list of "36 Things Every Single Girl Must Do Before She Settles Down," here's a (somewhat partial) list of my own personal Things To Do While I'm Still Unattached:

- Master the art of handling situations with proper grace. It's not that easy for me to do in this day and age, especially in an environment that demands as much brutal honesty as possible, but I've always believed that taking the high road is an act of subversion in itself. And, seriously, after everything that I've been through in my life - graduate school, dengue fever, unemployment - why would I want to lower myself to the level of a bar skank? Might as well pick myself up like a lady and poison my enemies with kindness.

- Start appreciating the value of my own work. Whether it's for my job, my community service, or my writing assignments (including this blog), I have to get used to the fact that I am doing quite well for myself and I am blessed to be where I am in my career, which should only push me to do better and go further.

- Speaking of pushing, two words: Jillian. Michaels. Followed by two more words: Jeff. Galloway.

- Travel alone. I had a lot of reservations at first about traveling on my own for the first time in years, mostly because of the cost and the possible inconveniences I could cause by leaving the Philippines. Then I thought: If I'm not going to take this trip this year, when on earth am I going to take it? By the time I got past all the critics in my head getting in the way, there was no longer any doubt in my mind that I have to make this happen, now or never.

- Explore my own home town. That's what the long power walks are for. 

- Bust out of the style rut. Right now I have resolved to finally get an LBD - doesn't matter if I have to buy it or have it made, as long as I get it done. Also on the list: platform stilettos, long-sleeve shirts, pencil skirts, and   a lot of scarves.

- Get an honest-to-goodness facial at the dermatologist. Yep, you heard me! I have never had a facial outside of my own home, so I might as well get it done right.

American Gods: A Novel- Read at least one book for fun every month. Or at least finish all the books that I promised I'd finish in 2010. (American Gods, I am looking at you.)

- Start knitting again. Even if it means I'll end up making a ton of hats.

- Dance, unapologetically, to as many cheesetastic pop songs as humanly possible without any guilt and recrimination whatsoever. Seriously, when you stop and think about it, the club can't even handle me right now.

- Also: See above, but replace "dance to cheesetastic pop songs" with "watch TV shows about hot, sweaty men in all sorts of boneheaded shenanigans."

- Write as much as possible.

- Re-edit the novel I wrote for NaNoWriMo 2010, because I can.

- Write 100 pages' worth of screenplay for Script Frenzy 2011 in April... and after that, get cracking on NaNoWriMo 2011 in November (now with 100% more working outline!). Why? BECAUSE I CAN.

- Master the art of meditation. 

- Master the art of living in the moment. 

- Above all: Say "please" and "thank you" more often, as genuinely as possible, and never give up. 

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