So: Where do you go after you've followed up the worst day of your life with a weekend full of love, laughter, and lots of new friends?
What do you think would happen if I'd taken off for a weekend, dog-tired and disappointed (let's just say that bureaucratic red tape + purse thieves = hell) - and deliberately leaving my cell phone, my diet journal, and all my expectations behind?
Mind you, my food was rationed, too, even if it was all delicious and diet-wrecking. That was nothing compared to breaking out of my shell and getting to know people better. That was nothing compared to people pulling me into group pictures every five minutes.
It was like my birthday all over again, but with more people.
(SPOILER ALERT: More revelations and epiphanies, right after the jump.)
And this being a weekend away from home, I learned a lot of things about myself that I didn't expect. Things I would not have realized if I didn't leave Hawaii - about my vanity, materialism, and especially my spirituality as a Roman Catholic. Not that I'm walking away from blogging; on the contrary, I want to keep on writing, and keeping my mind as sharp as possible. I also don't want to stop dieting, either, because that's just part of the recovery process for me.
But I do want to atone for trying too hard to be the person that I wasn't meant to be - for trying to mold myself into the perfect daughter/ sister/ friend, when I could've just saved myself the effort and shared myself with those who know me best.
Tomorrow I start my new job at the university. Another new start, another revelation ahead. Can't wait.